It is the 1745th of March 2020 (aka the 9th of December 2024)
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Olympics 2024 opening
The opening ceremony of the overpriced and overhyped four-yearly sporting event is always a chance for the host country to show itself off.
This year, for the first time, France decided to do something completely different and rather than holding it in a massive custom built white elephant stadium, instead used the city of Paris as the auditorium.
This, I can imagine, would have been a bit of a damp squib for the tens of thousands of very soggy people, for the big concert was by the Eiffel Tower, the Olympic Flame stuff took place elsewhere and... yeah, the weather was not kind.
The concert, however, was bizarre in a very French way. Indeed, the only thing that could have elevated the proceedings (asides from, you know, that big glowy ball in the sky) would have been in Jean-Pierre Jeunet was the director. If you aren't familiar with French auteurs, he is the man responsible for Bigbug and The City of Lost Children, but you probably know him best for Amélie. You can see where I'm going with this, right?
As was expected, there was plenty of lights on the big broadcasting tower. Ironically, this temporary construction was decried as a painful eyesore when it was first erected, but I think now you'd be hard pushed to find anybody who knows anything at all about Paris that doesn't imagine the Eiffel Tower as perhaps the defining thing. You know, unless you get some art nerd who says La Louvre first...
Image from live broadcast on BBC One South HD.
Somewhere along the way, there was a brief incursion as the Martians attacked, realised there was nothing of value on this lump of rock, and then went off to bother Venus.
Image from live broadcast on BBC One South HD.
And, there was one part that was a massive wasted opportunity. During the light show, the two searchlights rotating around the top of the tower came together and then pointed down towards the stage. That would have been the most epic introduction to a performer... but nothing. It was just a part of the light show. Pffft.
Image from live broadcast on BBC One South HD.
Elsewhere, one of the horsewomen of the apocolypse turned up, and no I'm not talking about Charlotte Dujardin...
Image from live broadcast on BBC One South HD.
The flag of the games was, comically, hung upside down. I don't know if this was a mistake or some sort of French quirkiness that has escaped me.
This guy, the President of the Organising Committee, with the happy woman holding his umbrella, seemed to be enjoying himself.
Image from live broadcast on BBC One South HD.
This guy on the other hand, and sorry I missed the caption with his name on it ☺, really needed to smile a little and stop looking like he'd had a very large stick shoved right up his arse.
Image from live broadcast on BBC One South HD.
The official Olympic cauldron is insane (in Seine?). Rather than being a thing at the corner of the stadium that burns loads of fuel for the duration of the games, France has only gone and stuck it on a balloon floating some thirty metres above the city.
Image from live broadcast on BBC One South HD.
At the end, to round it all up, the most famous French singer who isn't actually French doing an hommage to Édith Piaf whilst looking like a Disney villainess.
But, really, I think the most defining images are of all the soaked people and the general attitude of "Yeah, it's pouring, and?".
Hives, but why?
At work on Thursday, as I went on break I felt the centres of my soles itching rather a lot. Okay, so I'm tired and fed up and it's a week to go then summer holiday.
I got home, watched something, looked at the forum, then got up to make something to eat. By this point I had quite an unpleasant rash of raised red blotches along my tummy, partly on my legs, and where my underwear runs (the elasticated parts). Hmm... it can't be a flea as I haven't been to feed Anna yet, nor a mosquito as I haven't had the windows open, so... some other sort of bug? There are a few small flies in here, sadly they seem immune to the bug zapper, but I don't think one of them would burrow into my clothes to make a meal out of me.
By the time I finished my meal, a red rash along my chest. And by bedtime? Itchy arms. I told myself that if it went to my neck I'd figure out who to call in a maybe-sort-of emergency. I didn't think it would justify a 112 call as I could walk and talk and breathe, but everything itched like hell.
As I'm sure you can imagine, I barely slept. The little I did sleep, I'd wake up scratching. That's why my left side was quite poorly yesterday. You see I'm fully left-handed and favour that side so I'd wake up scratching. My right side was less upset as by then I'd be awake enough to think "don't scratch it dumbarse, that'll just make it worse!". Earlier today I got some horribly expensive lotion from the chemist that is supposed to soothe ichiness.
During the course of the night, the rashes - that didn't quite make it to my neck, eased off in reverse order, so that by morning I itched but nothing like during the night.
Friday was unpleasant. A lot of itching, and sensitive skin that would pop up a few more rashes at the parts like where clothing rubbed or something pressed against me (like sitting down). Today it's a little bit better.
I'm going to go with some sort of allergic reaction. To what, I don't know. I've never had anything like that before. Rashes, sure, if I'm bitten by something (spiders, fleas, mosquitos, those massive black flies, etc) but they're always localised to the affected part of the body. Never "everywhere". I can't imagine it was something I ate as - from my perspective - there was nothing at all unusual about Thursday. Just another day like the days prior.
Plus, I would struggle to believe that eating something could cause my skin to freak out with absolutely no digestive disturbance whatsoever. I do have food allergies (I think to pesticides or something? and sulphates perhaps in the case of alcohol?) but pretty much the result of that is gut ache and toilet runs. So to eat something to cause my body to try to flay itself with no gut issues whatsoever? Nah, I'm not buying that.
So, I don't know what the hell that was. But I hope it doesn't happen again for a long long time as I'm shattered and will likely crawl into my bed kind of early this afternoon evening.
Pasta with no sauce
I was watching an episode (1.03 if I recall) of A Kind Of Spark on CBBC where the father was dealing out a pasta meal to his three daughters, two of whom are autistic... Keedie, no sauce, Addie, smooth sauce, and Nina (regular sauce).
Image from a broadcast on CBBC.
I feel seen. ☺
While I can tolerate sauces (unless tomato peel, ugh!), I don't much like them. By preference I would cook pasta with a chicken stock cube, strain off the water, slosh the pasta around in some butter (not marge, not oil) and sprinkle in a little bit of black pepper.
Watching that made me hungry, so...
My preferred way of eating pasta.
For today, however, I'm doing fish and chips in the air fryer.
Why Doctor Who was a massive disappointment
Image totally not created by me, come on...
On one hand it is good that The Doctor is still around. But on the other hand, this current incarnation is awful. And, no, not 'cos he is... you know...
First of all, he seems to run around like a scared child half the time. This is a far cry from The Doctor that single-handedly busted his way out of a solitary prison and faced down the Time Lords that had imprisoned him. This is a far cry from The Doctor that had reunited with Amy (many years later), figured out what was going on, and told the aliens in no uncertain terms to get off this planet.
Secondly, while the actor Ncuti Gatwa is capable, there's something rather off about his portrayal of The Doctor. The character is supposed to be a brilliant and very eccentric genuis with a side order of clown to throw off his opponents. When facing down what looks like some sort of Egyptian God, he shouldn't look like he needs a nappy, he should just shrug nonchalantly and offer it a gummy bear.
Now, I don't know if there's some plot afoot to try to humanise the alien Time Lord, but it's worth noting that the alien Time Lord is, in fact, an alien Time Lord...who just happens to look like a human because, you know, casting. We don't have access to actual alien Time Lords so we get humans to pretend. But don't make the mistake of thinking he's human. To so have him rescue babies in space (already a rather implausible scenario) and then get scared by space snot (yes, really)... it just seems to be... a bit pathetic. There's no authority here.
The one with the music, it went even further and had The Doctor screw up (leading to The Beatles saving the day) and the companion having to near enough save herself. What.
[and we'll just gloss over the war episode, Dear Time Lord, why?]
Thirdly, there's no authority when he isn't even there for long periods, leaving the supporting characters to carry the show, whether it's a pretty-but-clueless citizen in her own private bubble, or the companion trying desperately to find out who that woman haunting her is while also rescuing The Doctor who screwed up yet again. I mean, he's not to much the hero as the anti-hero by now.
Peter Capaldi's Doctor laid out the entire philosophy as "never cruel or cowardly". I can't imagine the current Doctor being cruel, but never cowardly? Uh... about that.
Fourthly, stop pushing agendas about sexuality. The programme is supposed to be escapist sci-fi fun. Whether somebody is trans or gay or all the colours of the pride flags should be a small part of their personality. They might wear a frock while kicking a Cyberman between the legs. But it shouldn't be the major part of their identity.
There are many jobs and many talents in this world. Baking, nursing, plastering walls, animating GC dinosaurs, picking up rubbish, sniping the bastard serial killer from three blocks away...
...and the only reason that some of these jobs have specific gender requirements is because of bigoted arseholes and religion (but I repeat myself). Men can cook (hmm, not so much this one!), while it's been a stereotypical role for women for a long time. Men can be extremely clever scientists. Allow me to introduce you to Doctor Becky. Women might tend to be slightly smaller, slightly weaker, hence the problem regarding transgender athletes, but that does not make them incapable.
So in a work of fiction, by all means have a mixture of male and female and white and non-white and straight and gay. But these should be attributes completing the character's backstory. Not pretty much their only story.
Then there's the wokery like where Rose asks about the Egyptian God "What was all that Egyptian stuff?" and the doctor (I feel by this point he just doesn't deserve capital letters any more) snidely mumbled "cultural appropriation". Say what? Oh my days, are we at risk of offending a group of people who haven't existed for millennia?
I dunno... you know, I don't freak out when people at work wear a union flag shirt or talk to me about the ways to make tea, try to make various British baked things (like scones and crumpets), or fish and chips... I don't feel offended. I actually feel a little bit proud, both in my origin being recognised, but also some vague sense of knowing bits about it.
This is dinner:
Fish and chips, British style.
It's actually made in the UK. The food origin tag says GB LO 037 which is Bird's Eye in Suffolk. And, yes, half the stuff on the box is a massive cliché of Britishness, but it's not meant offensively so why would I be upset about this?
Likewise, if a woman thinks she looks good in a Qipao/Cheongsam (that's that sexy dress that Chinese women frequently wear in costume dramas), then why not?
I think there ought to be a big distinction between incorporating aspects of other cultures into your own life and behaviour, and taking aspects of other cultures for the purposes of ridicule. It shouldn't be a black and white "that's not your culture, you suck". After all, it's the many varied cultures and lifestyles in this world that makes it so interesting. If you discover something that resonates with you, why not try to incorporate aspects if it?
I, certainly, wouldn't get upset about somebody wanting to wear whatever that think is British national dress (whatever passes for an equivalent to the Qipao). Problem is, due to the messy and varied history, about the closest I can think of to an actual "national costume" is something out of Pride and Prejudice or, at a push, maybe a Morris Dancer? Easier to be Welsh (Welsh Lady outfit, which isn't that unlike a traditional Breton costume) or a kilt/lèine for the Scots (or anything in tartan really), or even Cornish (which looks like a cross between Welsh and A Handsmaid's Tale; maybe a "bal maiden").
I might, however, get upset if they drink the wrong sort of tea. ☺
And, finally... uh, what is this, the fifth entry in this whinge? Finally, fifthly, what the hell is with all the crying? I haven't seen this many manly tears since overly melodramatic Korean dramas. The impossibly clever and capable alien Time Lord who has seen and dealt with things far scarier than Sukteh crying?
Really?
No, just no. Get the [REDACTED] out.
I hope for the next series, the doctor will grow a pair, stop being identity-politically preachy, and get back to the job of dealing with alien threats. Because this doctor? He'd wet himself and run at the first sight of a Sontaran...
...but I rather fear we're more likely to see two Weeping Angels snogging. Because. <sigh>
Trump's Dystopia laid bare
Believe it or not, this is an actual quote:
And again, Christians, get out and vote! Just this time. You won't have to do it anymore. Four more years. You know what? It'll be fixed. It'll be fine. You won't have to vote anymore, my beautiful Christians. I love you Christians. I'm not Christian. I love you. Get out - you gotta get out and vote. In four years you don't have to vote again. We'll have it fixed so good, you're not gonna have to vote.
I know the man is full of dangerous deranged rhetoric, but... he's not even trying to hide the intent to destroy democracy in the country that is supposed to be the leading light of it.
Fixing a broken break maker
Part One:
Part Two:
Your comments:
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Gavin Wraith, 27th July 2024, 20:24
I would prefer an Olympic Games that worshipped Zeus, their original purpose, in which it was forbidden to show tokens of the competitors' nationality. In short, about people not sponsors.
Zerosquare, 27th July 2024, 22:34
I think the explanation for hives is pretty clear: you're allergic to the current incarnation of Doctor Who.
Rick, 28th July 2024, 07:40
Zerosquare - 😂🤣👍
David Pilling, 28th July 2024, 13:00
"Fixing a broken break maker" - "broken bread" sounds vaguely like a thing. It's more like "we have broken bread together". Looked like a lot of work to get the machine back together.
I thought the opening ceremony was quite good, gave the idea of the games coming to the city, rather than just another interchangeable stadium.
I stopped following about the time of the Dr who smoked - chilling realisation that Dr Who is not an alien but is us - like Sci Fi it's not about the future it's about now. Perhaps we can do them for cultural appropriation.
A tree-dwelling mammal, 28th July 2024, 15:06
I spotted a mistake:
"Somewhere along the way, there was a brief incursion as the Martians attacked, realised there was nothing of value on this lump of rock, and then went off to probe Uranus."
There. Fixed it for you.
*attempts not to start sniggering*
Rick, 28th July 2024, 19:35
Mine was much more highbrow. Hint - I wasn't necessarily talking about the *planet* Venus.
A tree-dwelling mammal, 29th July 2024, 00:51
Aww come on. Any excuse for a Uranus joke.
In a recent science magazine, the headline... "Uranus takes a pounding more frequently than thought."
Repeat after me... "I am a mature adult. I am a mature adult."
And then laugh like Beavis & Butt-head.
Rick, 29th July 2024, 07:53
Sorry, I was more Daria than B&B (who I just found intensely annoying).
A tree-dwelling mammal, 29th July 2024, 12:01
And if the Martians do attack, remember, all you need to do is play Slim Whitman's "Indian Love Call" at full blast and watch their brains explode.
(I just checked. I have a copy on my music server, so I'm prepared for any Martian invasion.)
Rick, 29th July 2024, 15:14
Hmmm, a plot device shamelessly lifted from "Attack of the Killer Tomatoes"?
Ord, 30th July 2024, 16:08
One hell of a great website I stumbled upon randomly. Love this. Greetings from Poland.
jgh, 1st August 2024, 02:27
Thank you for the Dr Who thing. I'd been struggling to put into words exactly what you've described so succinctly.
It's like for ages I watched something called The Crystal Gems. Alien possibly-artificial rock-based lifeforms escaping from a galactic war living in isolation on Earth, and discovering these weird lifeforms called "humans"... Watch if if you've not seen it, I recommend it. There's even a conclude-everything movie, and then a post-movie loose-end tying season.
But then I started reading commentary saying things like "well, it's all about non-binary, trans, genderweird, flexi-wibble..." Yerwot? THEY'RE ALIENS! They're non-sexual ROCKS! You can't force your narcassistic lifestyle outlooks on them...
And then it was as though people somewhere thought "viewers are clearly STOOPID, they couldn't notice an LGBTQURTUVWX allegory if it bit their leg off. So, boleaux for subtly, with Dr Who we're going to RAM IT DOWN THEIR THROATS and pheuque any plot relevence."
Sorry, Ncuti is a decent actor, but he needs writers who need to know they're WRITERS not polemicists.
David Pilling, 1st August 2024, 18:32
I saw a fragment of the detective drama "McDonald & Dodds" last week - at the end the bloke launches into "only 17 billion people have ever lived and the only truly lucky ones have been 300 million white males". This he explains is why he never really liked the murder victim, because he did not act like he was one of the lucky ones - so lucky he got murdered.
Back at YouTube - pro tip, for the reassembly video just show the disassembly video backwards - classic YouTube magic trick - arrow of time does not apply - try it with breaking an egg.
A tree-dwelling mammal, 2nd August 2024, 21:52
"Hmmm, a plot device shamelessly lifted from "Attack of the Killer Tomatoes"?"
Not specifically lifted, just one of the many sci-fi tropes that was so brilliantly parodied in Mars Attacks.
A tree-dwelling mammal, 2nd August 2024, 21:58
(Apologies for the double-post, hit Submit too soon...)
I had the same problem with my bread maker, the belt was knackered. I'd priced up a new belt, with postage from Amazon was about £16 or so. (I don't have Prime, and it wasn't eligible for Prime anyway.)
I'd been putting it off, although still on my to-do list. Then earlier this week I wandered into a charity shop and an IDENTICAL model was sat on the shelf, 6 months warranty, for £17.
I did the old "grab the paddle and try turning it backwards" trick, resistance was felt (so obviously not Vogon like mine had become). No accessories, measuring cups etc, but as it was identical to mine I had those anyway.
Works perfectly, and for about a quid more than a new belt I've got a source of spares. (Actually this one's in better condition than mine as mine took a few knocks when I was moving house, so I'll use my old one as the spares donor.)
Getting excited about bread makers - that's what our lives have become. Next it'll be air fryers.
SteveP, 2nd August 2024, 23:22
Ah, airfryers. Random things you try - the preheat "button" on mine seems perfect for toasting the standard burger buns into a slightly crisper wrapper for a burger. Should probably get a breadmaker and make something half decent in the first place I suppose.
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